My brain was off for so long, then something clicked.
No matter what the trigger was, I now float in floods of thoughts.
Great thoughts, bad thoughts, as useful as they can be useless, just thoughts.
Always thinking, rapidly, about this and that. Things in life, state of life, little joys, little failures, big joys and big failures.
Unstoppable but without pain, for once in a blue moon!
My state of mind surprises me. It's not about feeling 'alive’ and making the most of it. It's more about the process of thinking.
It's as if I never got the chance to meet with my brain lately (for the past few years).
Inhibited, numbed.
As if the grey matter needed a little kick of some sort. I am no fully aware and letting just about everything flow.
An encounter with someone has made me come back to this blog, I went through some of my texts, deleted a few that didn't ressemble me, kept some that were inspired by long gone sources of inspiration.
I've also been listening to some of my all time favourite inspiring music which definitely helped set the mood.
What I've been reflecting on doesn't truly matter to readers, they're necessary thoughts that I'm keeping to myself. Perhaps one day, when I'll stop feeling like I'm 24 again…(which is great, by the way!)
Regaining power.
But first I must learn how to smile as I kill.
[Thanks to John, and the many covers by fantastic artists - 'Working Class Hero’]